Here's how I described "SORRY!" in 1000+ words after a misunderstanding with 'the girl of my dreams'...
Here are all my intentions for you, love. You don't belong to this era, Radha (my beloved)
The worst part of a long-distance relationship is not the fact that you can’t have sex or kisses…. It’s the fact that you aren’t physically there to hug your beloved when she needs it.
You need to hug her!!! Especially when she is hurt, by others, pressure due to work, and crucially, when she is hurt by the one she loves like crazy.
Hugging heals… She is the healer.
I recently had a hard conversation with my Radha.
Mere words. Mere emotions…
That’s where we underestimate the emotions… Because the world runs on emotions.
And a little bit of this-and-that in those hard conversations… virtually… can do shit.
Because for one thing… the conversation is one-sided. The conversation is unbridged.
Hence, you can’t know if the words are hurting the other person because obviously, you can’t see their eyes while talking to them.
And those wounds cut deep.
The ones we love the most are the ones who hurt us the most.
Love is such a cheat sometimes… And at times, conversations go wild enough to make you regret the relationship you have in the first place… (Babe! I’m sorry!!! Please forgive me!!! 😭)
I’m so glad that my babe is immensely mature. Caring & strong. With a mix of emotions.
But at the same time… Love can be rewarding. It’s the fuel that motivates people to climb the mountains of suffering that never existed before, bruh… you never thought of them. And now you do… because it’s your duty to create a better life for yourself and your beloved.
The guys need to give more. No arguments…
Anuv Jain’s songs have something to them… Even if you don’t understand Hindi… Please do google the English translations. Because those are masterpieces.
And every single music video has its own story to tell.
The song Husn… Husn means beauty.
The lyrics says… Ask for my heart instead of my beauty and I’ll melt away.
The moment she said …"Did you hear Husn?”
I knew that I had done a HUGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MISTAKE.
I’m naive… A man’s needs are simple. They are simple emotions. No complexity. You want something, you get it. You can’t, you leave it. Of course, exceptions are excluded. My intentions were simple as hell.
I loved this woman. I devotionally love you. And I’ll, always. Unconditionally.
You might argue… does unconditional true love really exist in this era?
True love… at its heart, knows no reason. If the thoughts are aligned right… There’s not a single doubt when you love the person. You can fall in love consciously.
But that doesn’t mean not pursuing the person you love…
The acts remain the same. The only difference that happens is that you become very conscious of all your emotions.
Nothing more, nothing less.
And Radha, this is completely for you…
Dear Radha,
My intentions were the same as yours… To love… To know what love actually means. And every day, it seems to be amazing if you are there with me.
I don’t want your body. I never wanted your body. Not your goddessly divine beauty.
I only wanted your heart. I had it. And I shattered it. I know that my words made your heart fall apart. I’m sorry even though I know that a ‘sorry’ is never going to mend it.
I never entered in your life to ‘get’ something from you.
The world is incapable of what I want.
It’s moksha.
I entered just like a normal person… I was no one. I was just a blank outline of my own darkness whenever I saw myself in the mirror. And yet, there was you, who would see a person I was incapable of seeing out of myself.
I liked your perspective. I liked your mindset. Your personality and your will to make changes in your life. That’s the burning desire.
It’s extremely rare. Rarer than pure diamonds.
I had never taken a look at your body at first. Because I stopped looking at the bodily features a long time ago. But trust me, I’m extremely glad that I have a super cute hot goddess as my wifey :)
I’m not here pretending to be innocent. You are everything to me. I’m very transparent with my feelings. Because through and through a man is hollow.
And the more the river tries to prevent itself from flowing into the ocean, the more it resists its own destiny.
'I never wanted to make you cry. I came… to stay. And you don’t need to text long. You don’t need to ask about my day. It’s fine. I’ll ask. Reply to me. That’s going to be enough. You are my Queen. You deserve to get treated like that.
I’ll give the efforts. I’ll give those efforts even if you don’t get time enough to ask me about my day or write me long texts. It’s fine. Don’t worry.
Even if you die…
I don’t think that I’ll ever let anyone fill the part of my heart that you fulfill.
I don’t fake. I talk straight…
I never faked my emotions for you. I never faked what I felt for you. I never faked a single word of all the long texts that I wrote to you. I care about you. That’s why I ask “Did you eat?”. Radha, my love was never fake. I would let you inside my mind if that would have been possible.
One day … if someone ever reads my story… you are gonna be there. You are gonna be mentioned in LOTS!!! Because every single day… you and your thoughts in my head motivate me to work harder, making me a better person.
"I even felt a desire to make something of myself because you were the first person I ever wanted to become something better for."
- It Starts With Us, Colleen Hoover
Look into my eyes, my eyes
Look at how my heart is
Even words can't describe it…
“I'm not even part of this race
Look, look, what kind of things are here
I even look at the words around here
I don't even belong here”
From Husn…
And perhaps… you don’t belong to this era where unconditional true love exists… Because from my side… you are loved UNCONDITIONALLY, Radha. I accept you with your flaws and your inner darkness.
You are never going to be alone. Let me in. I’ll never make you feel alone. I’m always gonna be with you. No matter what.
This is my our last life.
I’m yours… only yours… forever…
*Dies from peak fiction*
We men are simple...