What do you want from a relationship? - Love, Sex, or Care
Title: "What do you want from a relationship? - Love, Sex, or Care"
Table of Contents:
Introduction
Setting the Scene: Navigating the Maze of Relationship Expectations
Understanding Love
Matters of the Heart: Defining and Redefining Love in Relationships
The Journey from Romance to Companionship
Exploring the Role of Sex
Beyond the Sheets: Sexuality in Modern Relationships
Balancing Intimacy and Emotional Connection
The Essence of Care
Acts of Love: Nurturing a Relationship with Care
Emotional Support: The Glue that Binds
Finding Harmony in the Mix
Love, Sex, and Care: The Perfect Recipe for a Healthy Relationship
Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them
Personal Reflections
My Relationship Journey: Lessons Learned and Unlearned
Stories from Others: Diverse Perspectives on Relationship Priorities
Conclusion
Navigating Your Unique Relationship Pathway
Hashtags:
#RelationshipGoals
#LoveAndIntimacy
#CareInRelationships
#ModernRomance
#EmotionalConnection
#HealthyRelationships
#DatingWisdom
#RelationshipReflections
#BalanceInLove
#RelationshipJourney
Introduction
Sometimes, my father tells me… You can’t run ahead of your time.
Perhaps, I was born ahead of my time...
I don’t know. And one thing which I do know is that I have thing power… I have the power to put myself in someone else’s shoes and feel what they feel in their situation.
It’s called ‘empathy’, in short…
And due to the reason of having a lot of friends who are actually senior to me… It has made me gain a huge experience of what it is, to be in a relationship with the opposite and same sex.
I know what expectations and things strike inside the hearts and all of it has made me think & ponder enough (while I was pretending to sleep on that 4-hour journey 😪, in the bus, to return home….) to write this post.
PERSONALS… I have been only in two relationships yet. And … one was toxic so I got out of it. And another is going to run long… probably this lifetime.
Expectations can be tough, to be honest. And in this post, we are going to be diving deep into the minds of what people often think… when it comes to being in a relationship.
Understanding Love
Love is simple…
It’s us… the humans who make it complicated.
And nowadays, ChatGPT is also doing a great job in helping lovebirds, who are bad at speaking love… at communicating fluently and effortlessly.
Matters of the Heart are sometimes hard to define. But it’s the human heart after all… It beats. And sometimes, we think that it beats for ‘someone’. (PS Your girlfriend loves it when you tell her that your heart beats for you… Try it if you haven’t😉)
It gives you butterflies in the stomach. You can’t stop thinking and now… behold, you are in the realm of love. The most twisted curse in the world.
Love is like cancer…
It comes undetected but when it leaves, it shatters a part of you…
And it’s very crucial in any relationship to define what ‘love’ means to you.
And it’s actually important because you don’t know when companionship can turn into romance. There’s a thin line, which can be very easily crossed between besties who are of the opposite sex (unless one of them is homosexual).
Things can escalate quickly. And you might never know if this was the relationship that you actually wanted with that person.
And hence, you need clarity… what do you actually want in a serious relationship.
Is it pure love?
Is it pure sex?
Is it care?
Or a mix of the three?
This single choice and conversation with your partner might change your relationship for the better, for good.
Exploring the Role of Sex
If you are a guy above 18… with decent smartness to be ready with a condom and 72, and considering if you have a girlfriend who is ok with being under the sheets with you… Well, sex is going to play a huge role in your relationships.
If it’s purely for bodily reasons, it’s going to be sex.
But if there’s an emotional urge to match with the physical…
That’s when things turn into love-making.
And love-making is something all couples enjoy. Considering they love each other.
In modern relationships… if you are bad at sex… a good thumb rule from what I’ve heard… if you screw up 3 or 4 times in bed and if you show no interest in improving your skills… Please think about it because your relationship is in danger.
Because sex isn’t just about your pleasure. It’s also about the other person. If you cum early… it’s your SOLE RESPONSIBILITY to make her cum too… either by licking or talking dirty… it’s up to you what your weapon is. But the thing is you have to help her feel pleasure too.
There must be a balance between sexual intimacy and emotional connection at all times. Sometimes your partner might not feel like having sex because she is tired.
You have to respect that and give her a warm hug. And communication is super important in any relationship. Whether it’s a purely physical or a lovey-dovey life partnership.
The Essence of Care
Irrespective of what you choose…
In any relationship… acts of love are veryyyyy crucial. I mean it.
You might think that she is not giving you enough time. You talk it through. And be open with our feelings. The only thing that secretly kills any relationship from the inside is MISTRUST ( or LIES).
Acts of Love are the ones that save your relationship from developing cracks from time to time. And things need regular maintenance. Because you are dealing with humans this time… not machines. Hence, you can’t guarantee that it won’t need maintenance after a year.
Emotional Support… is the glue that binds your relationship.
Emotional Support is asking, ‘Are you ok?’, ‘How’s your health?’, ‘Did you eat’, etc. These are some small things that matter hugely in any relationship.
Finding Harmony in the Mix
In the end, it’s you. Just you. And you need to think and be honest withyourself andlater your partner about what do you actually want out of this relationship
To be very frank… there’s always a motive. No one loves you for no reason, unless you are a son /daughter/intimate family…
When we talk of loving romantically, either it’s the looks… either it’s the skills… sometimes it’s the money. But a relationship can only go long if the reason is to feel ‘home’ly in someone else.
Because without that… without that strong reason… your reason to be in a relationship is meaningless. And love should be selfless… If you are in a relationship only to satisfy your physical urges/bedroom fantasies… then talk it out straight with your partner in crime. So that there are no extra expectations from either side. That way, you won’t feel too sad when things come to an end.
Love, Sex, and Care is The Perfect Recipe for a Healthy Relationship… And here are some common roadblocks in relationships and practical tips on how to overcome them…
Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them
Communication Hiccups
Challenge: Misunderstandings arise when communication falters.
Solution: Foster open communication, actively listen, and express your feelings honestly. Regular check-ins can work wonders.
Balancing Independence and Togetherness
Challenge: Striking the right balance between personal space and quality time together.
Solution: Set boundaries, communicate your needs, and find activities that allow for both individual growth and shared experiences. You need to respect your partner’s privacy at times. They have a separate personal life which might not include you.
Dealing with Conflict
Challenge: Arguments are inevitable, but how you handle them matters.
Solution: Practice constructive conflict resolution—focus on the issue, not the person, and work together to find compromises. Don’t play the blame game. If you are a guy, act mature. If you are a gal, then, treat your bf like a little baby.
Managing External Pressures
Challenge: External factors like work stress or family expectations can strain relationships.
Solution: Prioritize self-care, establish a support system, and communicate openly about external pressures affecting the relationship. Schedule time for sex if you have to. But please… spend time with the person you are in love with… It’s super crucial. She’s your priority. You need to keep her that way.
Personal Reflections
Embarking on my own relationship journey has been a rollercoaster of emotions, filled with highs and lows. Here are some lessons I've learned (and unlearned) along the way:
Embrace Imperfections
Lesson: Perfect relationships don't exist. Embrace imperfections and grow together through challenges. You’ll always find something or the other in that person … but you need to accept the darkness and see the brighter and better parts.
Prioritize Quality Time
Lesson: It's not just about spending time; it's about the quality of that time. Cherish moments together, big and small.
Radha and I have video calls once in a while (rarely)… but we make sure that we make each other’s day in that short amount of time. (Radha, I love you!)
Continuous Self-Reflection
Lesson: Understand that personal growth is an ongoing process. Reflect on your own actions and be open to change.
BE DYNAMIC. Stand as you go. If she cheats… she might/might not deserve a second chance… But if she cheats again… move on, forgive but don’t forget. Because you deserve better.
And if you think, it’s getting toxic. Get out of it as soon as possible. You want someone to water you. Not someone who soaks all your nutrients.
Stories from Others: Diverse Perspectives on Relationship Priorities
To enrich our understanding of relationships, Here are some explore diverse perspectives from individuals who've navigated their unique paths:
Perspective: Maintaining a strong connection despite physical distance.
Key Takeaway: Communication, trust, and shared goals are crucial in long-distance relationships.
Second Chances and Redemption
Perspective: Rebuilding a relationship after facing challenges.
Key Takeaway: Forgiveness, patience, and commitment can lead to beautiful transformations.
The Unconventional Bond
Perspective: Breaking societal norms to find true happiness.
Key Takeaway: Authenticity and mutual understanding pave the way for unconventional but fulfilling relationships.
Conclusion
In these different layers of relationships… each thread contributes to a unique and beautiful story. All that you need to do sometimes is to STEP BACK & LET TIME do its job. Things change. And they change for the better.
There’s no perfect combination between love, sex, and care. And you must find what works for you… Embracing the diversity of experiences, learning from challenges, and enjoying the mutual happiness that comes from building meaningful connections.
Your path is uniquely yours, and every twist and turn is an opportunity for growth. Whether you're seeking love, connection, or care, trust the process and enjoy the ride.
If you can’t enjoy your own life. It’s a loss. And enjoying with someone who loves you … it feels different, to be honest 🫠 🌟